Those Boundaries

I guess that I am no different to alot of ladies out there struggling with personal issues particularly within our marriages. I am married to a man created in the image of YAH and precious in His sight ... I sometimes forget this :o( ...
We have had some REAL ups and downs and come through many challenges. We are not always on the same page when it comes to our individual walks with YAH ... he struggles alot, and more often than not gives in to the temptations that assail him. He struggles to commit 100% to his relationship with YAH and there has been alot of hurt sown and consequential reaping. I am writing all of this ... not to put him down  but instead to let it be known that in spite of all these things by the grace and love of YAH I will continue to love him and to be committed to him. I will continue to strive to be the help-meet that I was created for and I will trust all the rest to YAH ... he will rise up one day and be the man YAH intends him to be!!
A well meaning friend of mine gave me the book 'Boundaries' by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. I did not feel all that comfortable with the title and left it unread for awhile, that was until yesterday. I went straight to the chapter that deals with boundaries within marriage and started to read. At first I felt that alot of what they had to say made sense, it sounded good and made sense. I forgot that the enemy loves to hide in a cloak of light. I decided to implement some of what I had read ... and my husband and I had a terrible night argueing till 2 am this morning!! So much for that :o)
The whole morning I have felt nudged by YAH ... 'When to say yes and how to say no to take control of your life' - these are the words on the front cover. Have I not given YAH control of my life .... this includes my thoughts, my words, my actions and my heart. His Torah should be teaching me how to respond in matters of conflict. How I should treat my enemy and definately how I should treat and respond to my husband with whom I am now one. I don't think taking control over my life and setting up self once again on the throne of my heart is the counsel I or any other daughter of YAH should be taking. In Proverbs we are constantly told to 'get wisdom', 'seek wisdom' and James says if we lack in this area all we need to do is ask.
Below there is a link to a very good article concerning the pitfalls of the above mentioned book.How so many marriages are being affected negatively through it and even ending in divorce. I encourage you to take some time to read it :o)

http://www.cephas-library.com/psychology/psychology_boundaries.html
http://www.emilysfavorites.com/BoundariesInMarriageHeresy.html